Batman 35th anniversary

Batman’s 35th anniversary. With orchestra

There are three of us. The detective has bought the tickets and arranged this as a treat for the crusader as it’s his birthday, and being the oldest and being robin, I am, of course, the boy wonder. I was named Robin because of the show, after all, so Mycroft can suck it when he reads my reviews. He never reads my reviews.

“Where did you see it?” was my opening gambit. We are all 48, being the first 12 and 12 when it came out. Of course, I win because I do. Warner West End. I’m standing under the big yellow oval, looking for the Batman film because I can’t see it. I’m standing under it.

But this time, we are grown men. We go in. The detective has booked seats nearest the toilets. We have a minor go-ruching match for who gets the aisle. The birthday crusader wins. Then the detective, then me, but benign in our 40s more than the orchestra…intermissions! 

But then the film begins, and like the frank, iller DKR, with a live accompaniment, I’m leaping off a rooftop in the rain, baptising my chest, and maybe I should be on station way. I’m a man of 20 again, 15—12 years old. I can’t stress how emotive a live orchestra builds with Elfman’s score.

But I’m not 12 and have not sat, so I just took in the fi8lm since then. Of course, I’ve seen it, but shrewdly to deconstruct, comment, and critique. But to just see and be immersed. Not since my tweens, and as a man in my 40s, I think about how little it has aged and what Marvel could learn from it.

Firstly, it’s not an origin; I’m Batman. We see the cycle of crime play out, and he knows we know who Batman is. Why bother? The flashback is halfway through, and the film would work without it. He’s the goddamn Batman, and at no point is anything ‘out of a comic book’ or ‘ it’s some sort of cave full of bats’, no comment. The bat is elemental.

Secondly, They are grown-ups who have genuine relationships. Vikki Vale and Bruce Wayne are hot and posh and shag early doors, then he gets moody and ghosts her. And reconcile. It’s a rom-com. It’s James Stewart and Donna Reed. It is a beautiful life. They gave their full potential in return. But given how no one even kisses until they are about to be thrown off a roof in the MCU, I needed that. 

Thirdly, the Joker’s plan is absurd; it’s art-based. He really wants to see the whole world burn from above.

It’s a great way to be that young man again. We left and went to fight the crime of overpriced London pints. And then a long stroll. We discussed family, health and heckels from drunks. We even had a height competition. The detective was insistent he was 6ft. I pointed out I’m 5 ’11. And being taller than him, that’s not….he looked crestfallen. So I claimed to be 6ft 2.

Do you know why?

Because I’M the goddamn robin is why.

Worth doing. Do it again.